


Dare The Trickster

by GoofyGoldenGirl



Category: Loki: Agent of Asgard, Marvel, Marvel (Comics)
Genre: Filming, Gen, Humor, Inappropriate Humor, Mild Language, Taco Bell, YouTube, YouTube Video, dares, gross humor, internet culture, self aware characters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-08
Updated: 2015-11-08
Packaged: 2018-04-30 15:30:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5169008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GoofyGoldenGirl/pseuds/GoofyGoldenGirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>Loki tries to make a youtube dare video and things go horribly wrong. Contains slight gross humor. </em>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dare The Trickster

As soon as the camera started recording, Loki waved.

"Hello youtube!" He exclaimed. "It is I the one and only Loki and I am here to take on your dares!" He pointed towards the camera and winked.

"Last video I had you guys challenge me to do something out there crazy! But nothing super illegal ok? The last time, the cops came, I escaped with my life, and The Allmother was all over my ass but that doesn't matter! Let's see what you sent me!"

Loki glanced to the right of the camera. He tried not to look down at the list of comments he had printed out. He would later edit in a photo of the comments.

_I dare you to jump out of a window and crack your head open you stupid emo gay retard emo._

"Wo-oooow," Loki drew the vowels out as he looked up at the camera,unimpressed. "2010 called. They want their insult back. Next!"

_I dare you to rob a bank._

"I've already done that," Loki said.

_I dare you to clap your hands and spin around five times._

"No offense but that's stupid."

_I dare you to wreck havoc upon your creators._

"I am a self aware character, but I have no clue who my creators are," Loki shrugged.

_I dare you TO LIFT_

"Lift what?" Loki was confused.

_Jack off like the little cumslut you are!_

"N-o," Loki said flatly.

_Go to Taco Bell_

"Wait. How is that a--"

"Don't do it!" Came a scream.

Suddenly Deadpool popped out of nowhere and ran into the filming area. 

"Deadpool! How the _Hel_ did you get in here?" Loki had not expected this.

"Don't do it Loki!" Deapool grabbed Loki by the shoulders and shook him. "Don't go to Taco Bell! I went there once and--and--it scarred me for life man! It scarred me for life!"

"Whoa-whoa-whoa what happened?"

"Ok so I ordered this taco and I-I ate it. And then like my stomach did a thing and I like ran in to the bathroom. Just in time 'cause I started heaving my guts out."

"Ugh," Loki made a face.

"It was the worst food poisoning I ever had! It-it was bad. Like I've had bad tacos and this was _bad_ Like there was puke everywhere in the stall, man. You like couldn't touch anything without touching puke. And then mid puke I--"

"Too much information! This is a youtube video!" Loki covered his ears.

"No problemo! Ok, so like I'm better, but I hear a scream. So I peek out and oh my god there's a _serial killer_ outside!"

"What?"

"I mean it, there was a freaking _serial killer!_ He-he was wearing the hockey mask, and had a bloodstained turtleneck on, and holding a butcher knife. And there were these two kids huddled up in the corner. And they were screaming. Oh god they were so scared! So I run out and whip out my katanas. And I'm like--run kids run! And I whack off that guy's head in a single stroke! Bam!" Deadpool made a slicing motion with his hands. "And then I got the hell outta there! So you guys--"

Deadpool pushed Loki out of the way. He grabbed the camera and pressed his face against the lens.

"Don't go to Taco Bell! Don't do it! Don't _do_ it! You'll save more than just your life. You'll save your soul, your innocence, what makes you _you._ Think of the children! Think of the _children!_ "

Deadpool took a deep breath. He headed back to Loki who had just got back into his chair.

"Erm. Thank you for the public service announcement," Loki said. "Since I guess you're here, you'd like to help me with my video?"

"Heck yeah bro!" Deadpool fist pumped. "I love dares!"

"Good," Loki smiled. He began to read the next suggestion:

_I dare you to kiss your brother..._

"Hey this one's actually not that bad," Loki remarked.

He then read the rest of the sentence:

_on the mouth_

He looked again at Deadpool.

"Ah ha ha," he nervously laughed. "What's the last one?"

Deadpool took the sheet of paper and read:

_Get Bruce Banner angry._

Loki gulped.

"Oh. Fantastic. I have to choose the one that will leave me... less dead."  
*****************************************************************************  
Deadpool held the camera as Loki walked up to the door. The god apprehensively glanced behind him before knocking.

"Hello Loki," Thor greeted him cheerfully.

Loki motioned to Deadpool to get into a good position. He then faced Thor and stared straight at him. 

"Please don't hate me, this is for a video," he had gone pale. 

"What--"

He gripped Thor's shoulders and leaned in. His eyes were squeezed tight as he crashed his lips onto Thor's and held the kiss. Thor's eyes bulged as he froze; too stunned to react.

Loki pulled back with a sound between a gasp and a cough. He wiped his mouth and faced the camera.

"Deadpool. I'm going to Taco Bell," his voice wavered.

"Sure man but I ain't defending ya from some Friday The Thirteenth knockoff," Deadpool responded as they walked off. He lingered on Loki's retreating figure to then pan over to Thor who was shouting at the top of his lungs.  
********************************************************  
When Deadpool turned on the camera again, he reached out and knocked on the stall door. There came a groan from the inside.

"Is it going?" Loki asked weakly.

"Dude you don't need to do this," Deadpool told him.

"I-I have to finish!" Loki caught his breath as he began his monologue. "So I did it. Are you happy now? You happy now fangirls? You--" He gagged. "Well technically I did two dares. So so give a me gold st-a-arr…and Like. Comment...Sub--"

There came a retching sound. Deadpool jumped back.

"Subscribe. Un-until next time. I'm Lo--"

Deadpool tried to mute the camera as Taco Bell's revenge round two started. 

"Oh god! Oh **god!"** Loki shouted. He cried out in pain. "Deadpool! Get me a garbage can **quick!"**

The Merch With A Mouth fumbled about with the wastebasket by the sink. He rushed over. His camera hand was not steady.

**"Turn off the camera!"** Loki shrieked as Deadpool began to push the stall door open.

It went to black.


End file.
